And i am on the train to Vienna to take my flight back to Singapore.
Can't quite figure out my feelings.
I know I will miss all this so much yet I am not filled with sadness because there is this feeling in my heart that I will see all of them again and it's just a temporary farewell (:

And when I am thinking I like to listen to music while doing so hehe.
Recently I have been listening to this Russian dude Evgeny Grinko.
I normally can't listen to instrumental music but besides Joe Hisaishi, this might be the only other instrumental musician that I can listen to over and over.

<3 p="p">
I gotta catch them live when they are in Singapore mannnnnnnnnnn.
MONEY PLEASE FALL FROM THE SKY NOW!

(:

I am such a selfish and self-centered person.

I am starting to really like Graz.
I had quite a bit of personal time this week and I was roaming the streets and I chanced upon many beautiful cozy cafes and quirky shops.
Wrote them all down in my notebook and will check them out one by one soon (:

Hello (:

First blog post since exchange started hehehe.

Today was such a lovely day.

It was a simple day.
Woke up in the morning and went to the housing office to get my contract signed.
My room mate had lesson in school so I went myself but it was perfectly fine because I treasure my personal time as well.
Then made my way to the bank to get my rent paid.
Walked along the streets near my house and I discovered an awesome music store just opposite selling first and second hand cds and vinyls and I saw Muse's The 2nd Law and The XX's Coexist vinyls on display!
Roamed a little more and chanced upon a beautiful narrow little cafe and went in.
Turns out it's vegetarian and I got myself some warm delicious soup and bread.
The owner and other customers were really friendly as well and I left the cafe with a big smile on my face hehe.
Went to run some little errands and bought myself some shampoo and conditioner.
It was a mother difficult process and I had to use google translate to figure out what all the different terms meant HAHA.

Now I am back in my dorm and going to cook some food with my room mate.
She told me last night that she intends to go back to Singapore early in December because she can't bring her boyfriend over like she originally planned. 
So I will probably be going back to Singapore myself and will have alot of time to myself towards the end of the year.

I have no idea what I am going to do yet.
Maybe I will go travelling with my SMU friends, with exchange friends or maybe myself.
I don't know what the rest of my time on exchange has in store for me but I will take it one step at a time and have faith that things will unfold in its own beautiful way (:

Oh yes and Florence and the Machine and The XX will be performing in Europe and ideally I can catch them both in the UK with my dear friend Fiona who will be coming over to Europe in December. Also, Noah and the Whale, Lucy Rose, Daughter and Villagers will be performing together in a gig on November 26 in the UK. WHAT A PERFECT GIG. I reallyyyyyyyyyyy want to go, I have no idea who am I going to go with yet but I will see how it goes. (: (: (:

Because my dream honeymoon location has always been Maldives and I absolutely love the Bossa Nova genre.

I don't know what love is, but I know what it isn't.

North:
Czech Republic
Poland
Lithuania
Latvia
Estonia
Belarua
Russia

South: 
Hungary
Slovenia
Croatia
Slovakia
Romania
Serbia
Bulgaria
Romania

Central:
France
Germany
Italy

A woman with a short temper.
A woman who fiercely guards the things that matter to her.
A woman who is emotional and it shows.
A woman who will not pretend and hide her dislike.
A woman who needs spontaneity and fun.
A woman who also sees the serious side of things.
A woman who longs to explore the world and soak it all up.
A woman who is drawn to a man with a story, full of knowledge, maturity, passion and opinions.
A woman who has always been searching but has yet to find or be found.

Guilt.
Building up in me and making my heart ache each time I think about my mother.
She gives me the freedom to do what I wish, to spend my time with my friends every day, to escape for months to a foreign land and to spend the money she has been saving up all her life.

She is independent, she does not complain, she does not splurge on herself, she shys away from words and actions of affection and always maintains a strong front.

I should start by spending more time by her side (:

Add Bridal Mask/Gaksital to the list.
Not my typical Korean drama but it managed to hook me in when I randomly caught episode 3 on KBS World.
It's got its good acting, impressive actions scenes and tragic story line.
I always cry buckets when there's sad family stuff and the story between the 2 brothers really got my tears falling like free.

YAY 3 DRAMAS TO WATCH NOW HEHE.

It's funny but I realised when I am enjoying the moment, I would not think of whipping out my camera to take a picture because it would spoil the moment. When I am happy, I would not think of putting my happiness down in words on a blog but just feel it in my heart.

Which is why what I often write about here is either 1) emo or 2) random things like shows and music HAHA.

So don't expect otherwise :D

I need romance 2012 with Lee Jin Wook and Kim Ji Suk. Which means I am officially hooked onto 2 dramas, I am so screwed.














And I have been listening to Mark Foster, Kimbra and A-Trak's Warrior on repeat. As much as I am not really a fan of Foster The People and this is all over the radio, still love it. Every time I listen to it, I am seriously jump and dance around in my room to it hehehe.

Cute little new song with Mr Adorable showing off some kung fu skills and pillow fights.
Hehe.

I've been watching Korean dramas so much recently omg......
Finished with 'Queen In Hyun's Man', really liked it except the damn lame last episode.
Got bored after episode 2 of 'I do I do'.
But 'Big' has managed to hook me in, DIE.

ONE REASON: GONG YOO

(but the show is also surprisingly very funny and generally everyone can act quite well)

 HEHE.

It's sad to see how you have changed so much.
But then again you change, I change.
You hang out with new people, I hang out with new people.
If we were to meet right now as strangers, I bet we wouldn't even get along anymore.

New WOW short drama:

罪与罚- 'Crimes and Punishments'

 

With my favourite Kengo Kora. One of the best young actors in Japan right now imo hehe.
It's a 6 episode drama about an introverted college student who dreams of becoming a writer and one day he discovers a school girl prostitution group run by a female high school student. He schemes to kill her but unforeseen circumstances drag him into a series of ‘crime and punishments’.

Only at episode 2 so don't know what are the unforeseen circumstances yet but I am looking forward to see how the story unfolds. (:

Satisfied my karaoke craving earlier tonight.
And my friend introduced me to this song, holy crap I am smitten hehe.

I have seen this dude's ktv videos on youtube but they all like the mushy whiny type but this is goodddddd.
His voice is still whiny but that could be considered his distinctive flavour.
And if you have a face like that, play the guitar and write good songs like this... it makes up for it. (:

'Do you know when a man is most pathetic? It's when he hasn't earned the heart of the woman he likes. Men don't just want the woman they love next to them, but their hearts as well. When you are this close to me, knowing that I can't have you is too heartbreaking. So I came up with a solution. if I can't have you, no one else can have you either.'

- Jung Jae Hyuk from Fashion King

Bad ass character like the crazy possessive guy from 'What Happened in Bali' who killed the girl he likes the the other guy who liked her. Basically the guy who doesn't get the girl at the end of the day.

Extremely cringe-worthy words that if said in real life would just warrant an eye roll and a slap.
But when a good looking guy says that in a purely fictional drama, it's considered charming HEHEHEHEHE.

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I want a hug.

Lee Je Hoon can you hug me? Hehe.
Shall go back to my 'Fashion King' to drown my sorrows.

And so it's my Damien Rice time of the month again and this time 'Grey Room' is on repeat.

Well I've been here before
Sat on the floor in a grey grey room
Where I stay in all day
I don't eat, but I play with this grey grey food

Desole, if someone is prayin' then I might break out,
Desole, even if I scream I can't scream that loud

I'm all alone again
Crawling back home again
Stuck by the phone again

Well I've been here before
Sat on a floor in a grey grey mood
Where I stay up all night
And all that I write is a grey grey tune

So pray for me child, just for a while
That I might break out yeah
Pray for me child
Even a smile would do for now

'Cause I'm all alone again
Crawling back home again
Stuck by the phone again

Have I still got you to be my open door
Have I still got you to be my sandy shore
Have I still got you to cross my bridge in this storm
Have I still got you to keep me warm

If I squeeze my grape then I drink my wine
'Cause if I squeeze my grape and I drink my wine
Oh, 'cause nothing is lost, it's just frozen in frost,
And it's opening time, there's no-one in line

But I've still got me to be your open door,
I've still got me to be your sandy shore
I've still got me to cross your bridge in this storm
And I've still got me to keep you warm

Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah
Warmer than warm, yeah

Like a beautiful poem that might appear in lit class hahaha.
I love Damien Rice sooooooooo much, I HAVE to catch him live man <3
I'll be waiting for my chance. (:

I love Blogger's new layout and the fonts being used hehe.

But anyway, what a lovely Sunday afternoon it has been.
My type of chill and worry-free afternoon which I haven't had in quite a while.
Waking up in the afternoon, food in the kitchen and enjoying it over this new Japanese drama I found called Innocent.

It is a mini drama produced by WOWOW, which is like the Japanese version of Focus Features.
So expect some freaking awesome shows with very unique plots, great acting and stylish directing.
Innocent is another mini drama, similar to Shokuzai which was shown a couple of months before, and it is just as good.

 There are 4 episodes, each revolving around their own female protagonist, and there is a common element of love in all 4 stories.

Perhaps the drama is about how each of these women, despite their different ages and phase in life, have a very innocent approach to love.
However, along the way things may not be going as well and some may be leading mundane lives as housewives while others are trapped in a fruitless affair.
But each of them learn to deal with the situation they are in and each story is developed very well.

The drama really shows the realistic side of relationships and marriages, which is something that a lot of girls need to learn about and stop living in their Taylor Swift inspired fairy tales. But each story closes by offering a somewhat bittersweet and comforting ending so it is encouraging as well.

<3

Today I decided to stay home to study.



Obviously I have not gotten any of that going cause I have been jumping around the house holding my own karaoke session. OH YEAH.

盧廣仲's talent, passion and sincerity is always so charming. OH YEAH.

Ok time to try and hit the books. OH YEAH.

Lucy Rose is all I have been listening to these few days.
If you are a fan of Bombay Bicycle Club, you would notice that her vocals are featured on their albums. (I bet she is dating Jack Steadman, the lead from Bombay Bicycle Club, who provides support vocals in this video)

I am such a sucker for female vocalists with distinctive voices who sweetly croon heartbreaking songs. Rachael Yamagata and Corinne Bailey Rae are perfect examples and my absolute favourites <3

The overall lack of public sizzle about the Spurs has always been a mystery and, honestly, somewhat of a disappointment. Yes, it's true they don't play above the rim or sell shoes. Still, they are an organization that takes care of its business, doesn't sell its soul to knucklehead players, is a positive part of the community and they win. Every year.

WELL SAID.

OMFG THOSE BITCHES REALLY GOT VIENNA.
SERIOUSLY IS THIS SOME SICK JOKE, GOT SO FATED MEH WTF.
FUCKING KILL ME MANZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Ok exchange shall be a real big test for me which I accept.
1) Learn to be REAL independent since I probably will be the only SMU student going
2) Remain civil with those 2 people and fight bitchiness with kindness
3) Learn to interact with people from different countries and different cultures and be open enough to optimise my experience there

THE CHALLENGE IS ON.

Ok to add to the cheena-ness, omg damn impressed by Rainie Yang's cover!!

OMFG.
Close to you is like THE BEST SONG EVER? (ok just kidding)
I love The Carpenter's version, I love The Cranberries's cover and now this.
This song always melts me into a puddle.

There are so many good songs with the word elephants inside.

Blonde Redhead's Elephant Woman
Warpaint's Elephants
Rachael Yamagata's Elephants
Beirut's Elephant Gun
Damien Rice's Elephant

(:

Came across this quote just now.

'You need to learn to be happy by nature, because you'll seldom have the chance to be happy by circumstances.' (:

Michelle, I'm fine(:

I have been missing out on this gem of a band all these years.
Our paths have finally converged <3

Toe performed at Mosaic Festival 2012, I unfortunately did not have the privilege of coming across their music before that.
Only happened to see their performance videos uploaded onto Youtube by someone whom I subscribed to.



As you all can probably tell, I am such a huge sucker for Japanese music (not the creepy kind with 48 girls performing on stage at the same time) but more of the 'rock' genre.
Not sure if I am right but I just get the feeling that the Japanese have been well exposed to American/British rock/band music early and the influence in their music is a lot stronger as compared to bands from the other Asian countries.
Or maybe I just haven't been venturing much into other Asian music scenes.

Sayonara Itsuka (2010)

'When you die, would you think of the one who loved you or the one you loved.'

Sometimes life just doesn't work out the way you want it and you live with the consequence of your decisions every day.
Live with the regret and always yearning for happiness which you may have already missed.
I don't want that to happen to me, I don't want to settle and regret for the rest of my life.
Which is why I think I will always be looking and searching but would I ever successfully find.

I have a shitload of work to do but yes I am watching a movie on Funshion AGAIN...

SIGH.
Nevermind I shall like work reallyyyyyyyy hard tomorrow and finish all my work HAHAHA.
And Sayonara Itsuka has my favourite Nishijima Hidetoshi (the whole cast is like above 35 years old HAHA) and the theme song is my Mika Nakashima, HOW CAN I NOT WATCH.

Guilty of basking in the attention and care.
Guilty of entertaining the possibility.
Guilty of breaking it when it gets too much.
Why does this always happen, I wish things were always more clear cut.
How can I enjoy your company without letting you misunderstand?
Guess that is impossible.

NISHIJIMA HIDETOSHI AND HASEGAWA HIROKI.
Joining the ranks of quirky looking but oh so charming 30+ Japanese single actors like Kase Ryo that I would so marry.

Throw in Ben Gibbard and I will be a very willing bride hehe.

The only reason I would have went for laneway this year would be to watch Feist.
I really love her latest album, all heartbreak and raw emotion.

And here's my favourite off the album <3

'When a good man and a good woman can't find the good in each other.
And a good man and a good woman bring out the worst in the other, the bad in each other.'

As always, SMU likes to scare people.
But still thanks nonetheless for the second chance and letting me accept the offer to FH Joanneum in Graz, Austria.
So, things are pretty much settled.
Visa for summer internship then off to Austria.
Thank you <3

And so it has been a jam-packed, exciting and fulfilling break week.
Some highlights were definitely the handball matches at NTU, Waikiki, my Visa internship interview and acceptance and my exchange.

I was given the offer to FH Joanneum (my 3rd choice but my only early application) in Graz, Austria.
The mother silly thing is I accidentally put some stupid rule on the wrong folder (my CAT folder which I deleted soon after last term) and my exchange emails were going there without my knowledge.
My com was also sent to CIT to be repaired so I have been using SMU live so I obviously had no fucking clue about my offer to FH Joanneum.

Until randomly on a Thursday night at 1am (Friday morning)I had a gut feeling about checking my microsoft outlook decided to just turn on my old com which I got back from CIT not long ago.
AND THE EMAIL WAS REALLY THERE OMG.

Panicked, was on the brink of tears, sent some really panicky email to OIR and could barely get any sleep cause I so wanted to hurry contact someone from OIR to explain.
Went down to OIR on friday to explain and they might be giving me a second chance.

Sometimes I think some things are really fated, it was fated for me to get FH Joanneum and yet for me to not see the email and miss the deadline but yet see it later on so that I could do something about it if not I wouldn't even have known that they took my lack of response as a rejection and automatic withdrawal from the entire exchange application.

And of course, I am the only SMU student that applied in the 1st round again.
WTF MAN.
EVERY TERM SO MANY PEOPLE GO ROTTERDAM AND GRAZ WHY EVERY TIME I APPLY I'M ALWAYS THE ONLY ONE.
God, you sure have a way of doing things.
But I will take on that challenge. (:

Just sent in an email to OIR to confirm that I wish to accept FH Joanneum (cause I was given a choice to think over the weekend whether I wanted FH Joanneum or forego it and try for my other 4 choices which are quite unlikely).

Will see whats the response from OIR, really hope they understand that I truly didn't see the email and would give me a second chance!!

And yet another Japanese band breaks up.
My favourite Remioromen decided to break my heart by disbanding this year, but lead singer and song writer Fujimaki Ryota will be going solo soon.

And my all time favourite from them:

Got to know the movie through this song.
After I watched the movie, the song got stuck in my head even more.
On a side note, Mark Chao so shuai hehehe.

Library level 5 is an awesome place to be listening to Joe Hisaishi.
A friend of mine just posted a video performance of the theme song from Spirited Away which I saw a few years ago and that led me to have the urge to relive my Joe Hisaishi youtubeing days.

This is my favourite:



Very very touching piece from Princess Mononoke <3

I probably posted this same video a few years back since I always reuse things on my blog because once in a while I'll get the same urge to talk about the same things HAHA.

Kaseifu no mita was the best performing Japanese drama of 2011 and arguably one of the best dramas in history.
Averaged ratings of around 20% and ended with a record high of 40% during its finale (the last time ratings hit 40% was during Takuya Kimura's Beautiful Life)
It was the comeback drama of the original Japanese goddess (in my eyes) Matsushima Nanako and it falls under the 'Human drama' category of Japanese dramas.

Key issues it covers are deaths in the family, parental love and a little on shotgun weddings and how sometimes the couple are not prepared for marriage and children.
From episode 8 onwards you'll be crying every episode unless you're not human!!
Matsushima Nanako and the children's acting is FREAKING GOOD :'(

I kind of regret starting it cause I can't stop omg! <3
Ok back to my episode 10 hehehe and reading my damn Business Processes case :(

I finally got my hands on the 星空 iphone case I've been eyeing but didn't get cause I'm stingy.
Went one whole round and in the end it came in the form of a belated birthday gift (thank you <3)

星空 is seriously my all time favourite movie.
I actually like the movie more than the illustration book.
Definitely the illustrations were extremely beautiful but even 几米 agrees that 星空 had great potential to be expanded into a movie and I think a great great job was done of it.



几米 mentioned in the video that 星空 is about qing chun's cui ruo and kuang ye.
All through the growth and development of a 13 year old female protagonist, a very very touching movie *cries*.
Perhaps more so for me because of the similaritiess I can identify such as the family background and being an only child.



And it has a very touching song by May Day, similarly named 星空 (:

【會變「辣媽」的星座】

第一名：獅子座。

結婚前是公主，結婚後當然要當個皇后！獅子女生就算不是嫁到豪門，也會把自己當少奶奶看待，永遠打扮得明豔動人，絲毫看不出她已經當媽了！

HAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHA :D

Just finished Shokuzai.
MINDFUCK.
Not in the bad way like Shutter Island but in a 'All hail Minato Kanae for the original story and Kiyoshi Kurosawa for the screenplay, how could anyone have written such an intelligent, thrilling and well-linked story'.

I still remember in secondary school, I had a teacher who showed us Zhang Yi Mou's Raise the Red Lantern and he told us that in Zhang Yi Mou's movies, if you were to pause at any scene, the scene would still look like a beautiful photograph.
Of course I take that statement with a pinch of salt but since then, I also used a similar criteria to observe every movie that I watch.

Shokuzai definitely fits the bill.
Additionally, there are also truckloads of good actors and actresses in every single episode.
All in all, I think it makes a very classy and intelligent short-drama which successfully explores many many ugly issues which are rarely brought to light.
Humans after all are very flawed creatures.

Ok now time to get some work done, I have fallen back into holiday mood after a cleared my presentation and mid term on Wednesday hehe!

The word 'Fuck' is most appropriately used in the following scenarios:

1. If you might be in the midst of sexual intercourse.

2. When you wanna listen to that new song you downloaded on the train but forgot to sync it to your phone.

3. When you wanna continue where you left off in your book but left it by your bed side.

4. When the raw version of the latest episode of that drama you are watching is out but the subbed one isn't so you dont understand what the fuck they are saying but you're dying to find out.

FUCK EPISODE 13 SUBBED VERSION HURRY COME OUT PLEASEEEEEEEE.

All my friends who have sat in my car over the past few months would realise that I have been listening to Chinese music channels.
Main reason is because I am currently addicted to singing karaoke and suffering from withdrawal symptoms so I listen to Chinese music channels hoping that they will play a karaoke-worthy song and I will sing along in the comfort of my car. (:

Unfortunately I feel like the more I listen to Chinese music on the radio stations, I discover other nice songs which I would try to find on youtube. As I search for songs on youtube, I get linked to other songs on the related bar on the right and the whole thing just snowballs and I find myself liking more and more Chinese songs and the urge to go karaoke only INTENSIFIES! :O

So once again I have been searching through songs on youtube and I think I am in love. 林宥嘉's voice is the kind that grows on you only after a while and for someone who can sing 你快樂所以我快樂 (another song from my childhood <3) with such individual flavour makes me fall in love with his voice. Doesn't help that I like his shirt hehe.



Ok back to my stupid Business Processes project research arghhhhhh. *pulls hair* I didn't even go on exchange or whatever but I have been having trouble getting back into school mode this term and still in a super holiday mood SIGH. :(

GIRL YOU GOTTA BUCK UP!!

Last night I randomly came across a tune and it sparked off the kind of feeling where you are like 'This song is so familiar, I have heard it before but I just cant recall what's the name of the song'. I knew I heard a friend sing this before in karaoke but the song didn't reach out to me that much back then so I failed to take note of the song title. So I embarked on desperate attempts to find out the name of the song, looked through the singer's videos on youtube and her discography and in the end finally found out the name of the song through a friend thanks (:

It's a lovely song about growing up.
Lyrics written by the wonderful Qing Feng <3
This is not the first time I have came across a random song and thought wow the lyrics are so nice and I research on the singer and song title then realise that the song lyrics were actually written by Qing Feng!!



在成長的過程中，我們都一度設定自己是一個怎麼樣的人，
但隨著我們經歷的事，碰到的人，遇到的難題
慢慢會發現我們離我們想像的自己越來越遠。
有時候也許也會讓自己感到很失望，也很討厭自己原來是這樣不完美，
也曾因此而倘淚。

但世界上的事情，就是如此，
成長，就是要學習從不完美，找出完美的角度，
我們都是Imperfectly perfect的。

All these pictures from friends going on exchange and all the talk about traveling during Chinese New Year gatherings is making me itch to get out of Singapore!
The holiday mood also hasn't left me since December as well and I so wish I could go on exchange or at least a holiday.

But once again I must remind myself, patience is a virtue and I should patiently wait for my turn and pray that I get my exchange next term (:

On a separate note, I have been in a really Kase Ryo mood recently, especially since I started on Shokuzai a couple of days back.
3 episodes into the series and I am totally a fan, every episode is so thrilling and it is filmed very well just like mini movies.
Each episode also covers different ugly issues that seem to be prevalent in the modern Japanese society but often hidden under the surface.

I also found out something else that is exciting! (to me only I think HEHE)
One of my favourite Japanese crime dramas, SPEC (starring Toda Erika and Kase Ryo) is coming out with a movie wheeeeeee.



I am a big big fan of Kase Ryo, there's just something so awkward and different about him that I find so awesome and of course he can act very well (:

I actually watched a few of his movies before I realised that he was featured in all of them and that's when I started to follow his films because I knew that it was highly likely I would like the films he chose to act in.
I've watched About Love, Nobody Knows, I just didn't do it, Honey and Clover, Tokyo!, Pool and my favourites Restless and Gravity's Clowns and I can't wait to catch SPEC as well (:
Although I am pretty sure I won't be able to find anyone who will be interested to watch with me but I am sure I can turn to Funshion :D

While I was youtubeing, I also came across a Japanese band called S.R.S.
Turns out the theme song of Gravity's Clowns is by them!



Featuring 2 Okada Masakis and a SX-70.
Their other songs are nice as well (:

Shokuzai (Atonement)

5 episode mini drama based on the book written by Minato Kanae.
Kurosawa Kiyoshi, director of Tokyo Sonata, became the screenwriter for the series and filmed it as well.
It is a mind-twisting psychological thriller just like Koukuhaku and Kurosawa Kiyoshi definitely utilises his expertise in the horror genre.
The cast is also very impressive, which includes my favourite Kase Ryo and many others who also have their share of critically-acclaimed films and series.
Kurosawa Kiyoshi, whom I realised likes to work with the same few artists over and over again, also features practically the entire Tokyo Sonata cast in this series.

But enough for tonight, one episode of Shokuzai has already left a great impact on me.
Shall continue with it another day, preferably in the day time instead (:

On another note, I was googling Minato Kanae and came across an article titled: 'New Writers Explore the Dark Side of Japanese Literature' which really caught my interest. It talks about a rising dark side in Japanese Literature with Minato Kanae's Koukuhaku (Confessions) winning the annual Hon'ya Taisho award and about the groups of female writers that are leading this change.

'...Could it be that the young women in Japan, whether they are writing melodramatic quasi-memoirs on cell phones or producing provocative literary works on paper, are the ones most sensitive to the dark undercurrent that permeates Japanese society, ravaged by a long economic slump? Does it explain why so many of them remain single and have stopped giving birth but write scary stories instead? Girls are losing hope for the future. Maybe we can reinstate it by listening to their voices.'

Fresh new start.

I finally found the song I have been looking for so long from Scent of a Woman!!
FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.



JK Kim Dong Wook's Bucket List.
The song was played during every freaking damn heartbreaking and realistic crying scene.
This is definitely my all time favourite Korean drama, and I barely finish any.
GREAT acting from both leads (I love Kim Sun Ah), beautiful scenes, some slightly cheesy lines but still tolerable, nice OST and a VERY good looking Lee Dong Wook. (:

Even though this is my second time doing the exchange application, it is still a pain in the butt.
And unfortunately, FH Joanneum (Graz, Austria) has an early application deadline so I need to stop procrastinating and hurry up zzzzzzzzzz.
As I was writing my exchange study plan, I started to daydream of traveling and this video popped into my head. (:



Enjoying a secure spot in my Top 25 Most Played in my phone, Camera Obscura's French Navy.
Love the song, love this bittersweet video.
A nice song doesn't necessarily mean that the video is nice but I really like this one!

Every once in a while, I will fall into yet another Damien Rice phase where I will put yet another one of his heart breaking songs on repeat for days and days.

Move aside Will.I.Am, Damien Rice is the true heart breaker.

After going on a hiatus due to her illness (and marrying the awesome mizushima hiro), Ayaka is back with a new album (:
She's my idol.
Very classy looking, great stage personality, great voice, faced her illness bravely and can also dress very well hehe.



And I'm really missing Indonesia.
It was just a good break and I think I really needed it.
Even though this team for the OCIP may not have been as bonded as Namaste, I felt like it was a much more eye-opening and meaningful experience.
Perhaps because I'm older now and I tend to pick up more serious issues and perhaps also because I was more involved as a member of the organising committee.
This time round I was in Programs instead of Logistics so definitely much more involved in the teaching part of the OCIP.

I realised I really like little kids, I got free kisses on the cheeks and lips from 2 cute little boys from this kindergarten called Elim Karos HEHEHE!
Next time I am going to inculcate the habit of giving goodbye kisses everytime my children go out of the house!
But I also realised I think I can only have 1 child.
I think I can't really distribute my attention and my care across a few children, I need to give my 100% to 1 child at any one point in time.

Also, I foresee myself going on more backpacking trips <3
Time to explore the rest of Asia!

And damn it, I need to start doing research for exchange application zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Still not sure where exactly to apply to, I'm only sure about Vienna and Budapest :/
Shall worry about this another day HEHE. :D

Sometimes you will realise that there are some people you don't need to bother about.
At the end of the day, you won't be able to have a true and long lasting friendship with that person anyway.
So don't get worked up

I guess it's a fact of life, you can never get along with everyone out there and don't expect to be great friends with everyone.
Try to maintain a friendly relationship with everyone but identify who are your close friends and treasure them.
Or perhaps it's just my personality, it can be quite easy for me to clash with certain other personalities :/
But regardless, I need to write a mental note to myself to lower my expectations of my relationships with the people around me and treasure my important friends <3

Realised I haven't wrote anything about my trip to Indonesia!
Great trip, took away much from the whole experience and I shall leave it to another time to elaborate (:

I have a soft spot for 方大同.
He's so humorous and awkward but most importantly, he is so talented and writes wonderful music.
And now, he's showing how good he is with the electric guitar which is one of my biggest weakness *melts*
But I wish he would eat more, well veggie that is since he's vegetarian. :(
The album '15' accompanied me through majority of study week and this is one of my favourite songs off the album <3

I am currently watching a Korean drama called Flower Boy Ramyun Shop. (along with 1 Japanese and 1 Taiwanese drama hehe)
Yes, judging from the name of the show you can tell that I am just a superficial bitch HAHAHAHA.
The drama has not much meaning but its quite funny and doesn't have those cheesy melodrama lines so it's still watchable.
AND, check them out:



You're welcome (:

I think I found my favourite movie.
Although many movies have a special place in my heart, but I think this one is definitely one that stands out.

I happened to come across it randomly, it's a new Taiwanese film called Starry Starry Night.
I think it was released around a week ago in Taiwan, and I just found out it is opening in Singapore tomorrow.
How strange yet lucky that I came across it tonight, but I would love to watch it again in the cinemas though (:
Recently, I have been falling in love with quite a few Taiwanese films.
I'm starting to have a soft spot for Taiwanese films just like how I do for Japanese films.

It's quite a short film, not incredibly full of dialogue yet without too many long silent scenes.
It has a great story line, well developed, nicely paced and has a very personal and fragile feel on a whole.
First time I cried within like two minutes of the film :(
Beautifully filmed, my kind of warm lighting, quirky and vibrant colours and every scene is like a well composed photograph.
And there is a very unique magically element to the entire film with gorgeous special effects.

I really thoroughly enjoyed watching the movie and i will remember it for a long long time <3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Explaining what 九把刀 wishes to convey through 那些年我們一起追的女孩 movie.

那些年我們一起追的女孩 book is very very different from the movie, in a good way.
I am only half way through so I can't be too sure about how differently or similarly the story will unfold.

Every day I have been reading the book, on the bus home or on my bed before I sleep.
Although some words I have no idea how to pronounce but aga aga can understand the meeting, in fact I'm quite impressed by my actual standard of Mandarin HEHEHEHE.

But anyway, I think I have been immersing myself quite seriously in 九把刀's youth and every day I've have just been extremely touched by his story and his sharing. I have never read a book quite like this before, a very heartfelt and sincere sharing from a very personal level. This makes me go beyond merely enjoying the story but also respecting the author himself and feeling very thankful to him for sharing his thoughts and feelings with readers.

RESPECT.
And I think I will have a soft spot for 九把刀 from now on. (:

I have come to learn that communication is one of the most important thing in maintaining relationships.
Honest and sincere communication is the key.

To the people that matter, we need to share what is on our minds and what we have hidden in the depths of our heart.
Holding back benefits no party, others are left guessing while you keep your true feelings inside and torture yourself with it.

Up till this day, I don't know what you feel about us and about what happened in the end. But not like I told you what I felt about everything either.

I am sorry that I always held back my thoughts and feelings, I am still learning to change my terrible habit of keeping things to myself. When asked about it, I would refuse to reveal anything and just turn away with a muttered 'Nothing.'. And with a determination that I don't see myself displaying during more crucial occasions, I would hold on to my worthless pride and keep my inner thoughts and feelings to myself. So silly really, all I did was make it difficult for you and me. I would like to blame it to being an only child, but I am sure that's not the only reason.

Communication was one of the key things we lacked and sad to say, minimal is left now as well.

I can only wish you the best from the bottom of my heart and I believe you would wish me too (:

“People like us: half of them think things will never work out, the other half believes in magic.”

Well it takes real guts to be alone, going head to head with the great unknown.
But there is no sweeter sound, on the kings round I'm bound.
And just waiting for your chance to come.

- Noah and the Whale's 'Waiting For My Chance To Come'

I pray pray pray that I get my exchange in Year 4.
I want a break, I want to travel, I want to go to Eastern Europe and indulge in food, sights, sounds and music that I have never experienced before.
I want to walk down the streets and feel free like a bird.
I want to do what I want to do and go where I want to go without having to worry about anything.

I think I have been listening to Beirut too much, his music makes me feel so joyful and free.
I can imagine myself plugging into Beirut while in Europe and just hopping and dancing down the streets <3

ho



hohoho <3

我可能不會愛你 has got to be one of my all time favourite taiwan shows.
I don't watch many, probably can count them on one hand but this is definitely one that stands out.

Core plot is about 2 friends, close friends since high school, college, university and now they are working adults who just turned 30 years old.
The guy has loved the girl for many years but has hidden his feelings and they remain by each others' sides as best friends, listening and helping each other through their ups and downs.
The show covers many issues about family, love, reaching adulthood, marriage, friendship etc, pretty much covering all the essential topics which I think everyone should always ponder about.
One thing that I really like about the show is that it DOES NOT have cheesy lines like the other 99% of taiwan shows which make me hate them oh so much.
The main leads featured in the show also act very well so thank goodness no horrible acting and weird chinese that make me cringe every time I watch them.

And now, just need to look forward to karaoke because I HAVE TO SING THIS SONG (and hopefully not cry like a baby) (:

Today was a good day.

A good saturday spent doing something different, something meaningful.
Snaps you out of the bubble that you stick your head in during the regular school days.

A day where we are all just humans, regardless of age or race, and merely wishing to help others in need.

My OCIP team went to Lam Soon CC in Choa Chu Kang this morning to carry out our pre-expendition CSP.
We were split into 2 teams, one team would paint murals at the HDB void deck while another team would head to a needy family's home to help clean up the place, paint the walls and bring in some new furniture for them.
I volunteered to go to help the family because it was obviously gonna be more meaningful.
Unfortunately the rest of my team begged to differ and only 3 of us seniors from the team went to help with the home along with other volunteers from the CC, but its ok because the murals turned out beautiful as well :D

The needy family was a family of 4.
Mr Koh was an elderly with a physical condition which caused him to have a lump on his back which inhibited him from getting a proper job.
His younger brother who is also in his mid years is mentally challenged and also suffers from a physical condition which caused his legs to be grown unnaturally and he can't walk properly and also is unable to contribute income to his family.
The younger sister is the sole breadwinner of the family, a lady in her 40s who pretty much sacrificed her time and her youth supporting her family and works as a beer auntie at a coffee shop nearby.
Lastly, the mother of the family is an elderly lady in her 80s who earns some money constructing plastic bags that many shops use by inserting the plastic handles into the plastic bag.

Their home was beyond my imagination.
They must have not done any cleaning at all for years, the floors were black and stained, dust and dirt particles stuck to the tiles and freaking hell loads of age old lizard shit stuck on the walls.
The whole house was cluttered with food donations and old items which perhaps they treasure deeply and don't wish to throw, but to most people it merely looked like trash.
Tons and tons of random old and dirty items that they kept, some because they had no time to clear and throw away and some they just couldn't bear to part with.

Cleaning up was the most difficult.
Rounds and rounds and mopping and sweeping and wiping and scrubbing.
And then came in painting, MOTHER SHAG but I thoroughly enjoyed it :D
Perhaps also cause I have a control freak side that likes to see things neat and like to see walls properly and evenly painted.

We also moved alot of furniture here and there, packed up alot of their items, brought in new cupboards, mattresses, pillows and fans for htem, changed their bedsheets and pillows.

All this was done along with a team of very kind and dedicated people.
Most of us were strangers to each other but there was a telepathic connection amongst us as we knew each of us was putting in our 200% to help make this house a better place for the family to live in and that was the best feeling ever :D

I foresee myself doing more of this in the future (:

Although I ended up skipped my 7pm Ethics make-up class, but seriously I don't need a class to teach me how to be ethical.

These few weeks I've pretty much been listening to only Bombay Bicycle Club.
Thoroughly won over by their second album (A different kind of fix) which just got released not long ago.
The first album was awesome enough for me but they just got better and better really.

Such talented young folks.
RESPECT.
They can write extremely catchy tunes with a good dose of rock elements and also write absolutely heart breaking songs.

How can a man be so good looking?!
*faints*

On Wednesday I wasn't feeling too good.
My heart felt heavy and I was just in no mood to do any work.
I decided to take a walk through the lifestyle section in the school library and a book caught my eye.
It was a small beige hard-cover book with a black spine.
It had no title nor design on the cover, and the title of the book could only be found on the spine where the library sticker even covered half of it.
It had no description nor summary and I had no idea what the content would be about.

Picked it up and read a couple of pages, got hooked and borrowed it.

Shame in the blood by Tetsuo Miura.
Very very good read imo.
Shall explore the lifestyle section in the school library more often (:

There are 3 things that i really want to buy right now:

1. Polaroid sx-70
2. Herschel little america
3. Zara beige blazer with blue lining

I need cash. And I must find some way to earn it asap.

“The heart is always right — if there’s a question of choosing between the mind and the heart — because mind is a creation of the society. It has been educated. You have been given it by the society, not by existence. The heart is unpolluted.”

I will bide by this from now onwards.

Listen 你現在的感情 從何選擇
看天氣的臉色 還是體溫
幸福不會是牛頓 一顆蘋果成學問
所以 得不到那個人 是否該恨

Listen 你現在的人生 要什麼呢
出門要豪華車 或隨緣份
幸福或許是諸葛 三顧也不見得成
所以 達不到你要的 是否該扔
又或者 永遠是不可能 滿分

You say why 愛讓寂寞像永恆
And why 愛像過客不聞不問
Oh why 愛 似乎總不貼近靈魂

Listen 回憶裡的氣氛 是熱是冷
孤芳得像天鵝 還是風箏
或許就像哥倫布 錯誤點起萬盞燈
所以 是不是還想要 再試再撐
又或者 因為曾有的疼 沉淪

You say why 愛讓寂寞像永恆
And why 愛像過客不聞不問
Oh why 愛 似乎總不貼近靈魂 怎麼能

相聚 分離 光影涼了又溫
想起 忘記 眼淚淺了又深
凡美麗總像是流水逝去不會轉過身
雨水卻在不知名的清晨紛紛

You say why oh 寂寞像永恆
Why 像過客不聞不問
Oh why 愛 不貼近靈魂

I say why 愛讓你充滿疑問
And why 愛總讓你一點不剩
Oh why why 愛只需建立在一個吻 怎麼能

Every time I listen to Tennis's songs, I get so inspired by their love.
A young married couple who pooled all their money together, bought an old sail boat, taught themselves how to sail, spent months out at sea until their money ran out, wrote music based on their journey and experiences and earned money through that.

Finally found out what's the song title.
I only heard like a 20 second clip of su da lu performing this song and I was hooked.
Tried finding what was the song title to no avail until a walking music wikipedia friend told me the answer.

Love this song, love this performance, love the lyrics and I personally prefer this to the original.

Now let me listen to it again and :'(

I think in one day, you can only watch one movie.
Then you spend the rest of the day, soaking up the after effects of the movie and daydreaming about the other world that you were just brought into.

I really can't get myself to concentrate on studying for mid terms.
I think I'm just going to go and whack for CAT mid terms tomorrow.
My mind has been filled with exchange thoughts, one of the worst decisions I had to make in my life.
This reminds me of the time when I made up my mind to go to NUS Real Estate and then my cousin called me up to have a long talk with me trying to convince me to come to SMU instead.
I remember crying like crazy during that conversation, so troubled by the decision that I had to make.

You know the feeling where you just go ahead and do something for the sake of it.
I applied for my exchange for the sake of applying because everyone applies in summer.
I applied for Europe because it's what people normally do.
What I truly wanted was Japan but I was scared because they were all either 1 or 2 slots and the term period was really bad.
I chose Netherlands not because I really wanted to go there but because I was limited due to constraints like number of slots and term period.
In the end, I led myself into the shit situation that I am in and now I find myself so unhappy I just want to pull out of exchange.

Because I didn't know what I originally wanted, I just did something for the sake of it and now I have to find a way to get out of it.
I know that the only reason why I would proceed with this exchange would be to take up the challenge and prove that I can do it, and it is not because I really want to go to Netherlands nor is it that I really will be happy living myself in a foreign land.

If I were to reapply for fall semester, I won't be guaranteed a place at all but thank goodness at least OIR told me I don't need to resubmit my academic referrals.

I don't want to bluff myself like I will be happy going on my own, I think I am just going to pull out.
I'll reapply again in fall and if I don't get it, so be it.
At least I know I didn't force myself to do something I didn't want to do.

Today was a good day.

Had lunch with Zhao Loong and Jin Dao at Ah Loy Thai.
Last installment of our Wednesday lunches, bon voyage Zhao Loong (:
3 people, 5 dishes, we were STUFFED. (like a teddy bear hehe)
Continued to test our limits with some Tom's Palette before heading to school.

Unfortunately, cramps got the better of me and I ended up rushing home and knocking out on the bed to fight the cramps.
Woke up past 8 boo.

Then had one of the best suppers ever.

Went to pick up Michelle Lai at Greenwood after her work then spontaneity brought us towards Upper Serangoon Road, then we begin heading down Bartley Road and we decided to pop by Jin Dao's house and ask him if he wanted to hop into the yellow submarine and join us for supper.

First up we decided to head for frog porridge.
Because 1) we wanted something filling 2) I was in the mood to try something I never tried before.
So we set off and we realised, THE SHOP CLOSED DOWN BOOOOOOOOOO.

Neh mind. I give Jin Dao another chance to recommend me something.
So off to Serangoon Central for some fish soup.
Store closed :'(
Got myself some signature ba chor mee instead. Quite meh but it's ok.

Then we decided to try out this little chinese desert shop that we passed by while walking from the car park.
It's run by an elderly couple and the deserts are extremely affordable with a wide variety offered.
We got ourselves some Bubor Hitam and Yam Paste and the elderly lady was extremelyyyyyyyyyyy kind and helpful.
We thanked her for the deserts and water and told her to go home soon to rest, then she shared that by the time she reaches home it'll be 2am :(

Dropped off Jin Dao at his place and headed to Michelle's.
It was nice talking to you in the carpark, thanks for the advice my dear friend :D
After all these years, I am glad to still have you in my life.

Reached home at like 130am.
Didn't get any work done at all the whole day but today has been a good day and helped to refresh my spirits.
Thank you my friends.

And to end of this beautiful night,

Musician Crush: Alister Wright of Cloud Control.
Damn right (:

#Leo people tend to dislike: Taking instructions
#Leo people tend to dislike: Criticism
#Leo people tend to dislike: Coming in second place.

I really feel like shit today.
Just so full of regrets, eating at me from the inside.
Fuck this.

I think this is why I like Japan.

Beautiful scenery.
Good Music.
And this incredibly kind and supportive community spirit.

Although you always read about how the Japanese community is actually very cold and there is a strong case of urban isolation, I feel that they have proven that there have it in them to be united, especially in times of crisis.

I don't know exactly why do I have such a strong interest and I'm not sure if this connection I feel is exactly justified but it's undeniable that Japan has a special place in my heart.

As much as I always strive to be a good person, I am but a flawed human being.
One that feels like she's losing grip on the things around her.
Maybe exchange will be good, change of environment and perhaps new beginnings.

1) I hate being accused of something I didn't do.

2) I hate it when someone else who doesn't understand the situation butts in.

You really don't know when to stop do you.
You think it's very funny but seriously, what's your damn problem.
I am pissed at the same time I'm very disappointed, what an insensitive person.
I am trying really hard to control my feelings, which is why I have to resort to letting it out here.

As a #Leo,Somehow you can be jovial, sunny and friendly, yet remain so independent and authoritative.

But I realised I have a soft spot for emotional people who tend to hide their feelings.
I wish I can be there by their side, be their listening ear and help them in any way I can.

Unless it is mad, passionate, extraodinary love, it is a waste of time.
There are too many mediocre things in life.
Love should not be one of them.

I just had this feeling of pure happiness and joy seeing my friend get attached.
(I'm quite surprised at myself HAHA.)
But I think I recognise what is real joy when I see it and it influenced me immediately!

I'm so so so proud and happy for you, I think you got the right one this time (:
May the love between the two of you grow with time and stay strong!

I need to declare my love for Foals.
Definitely going into my top favourite bands.
Just based on talent, I give it to them for being a bunch of young english lads writing these awesome tunes and playing so well live.
From the epic emotional Spanish Sahara to sexy tunes like Miami and catchy loud songs like Balloons, I can pretty much turn to them during any mood.
Definitely they are not known for writing meaningful songs that tug at your heartstrings, but I'll leave it to other bands to do that for me (:

And when you have a cute drummer, I give you bonus points hehe.






What an acoustic version, love justified <3

I thought we were at least friends, I wasn't expecting anything more.
But I guess we are not cause no one treats their friends like crap.
Your attitude is really shit.

A #Leo woman a is strongly individual and needs to live her life in her own way on her own terms. She needs to get her deserved recognition.

Went for an aunt's wake a couple of nights ago.
She has been battling cancer for a few years along with her husband and only son.
Her son is my age, just turned 21 this year.
While I was helping out at the wake and spoke to him during some moments of the funeral, he seemed to have accepted it so well and had a strong look on his face the whole time.

Since I was young, losing my parents was always my biggest worry.
As an only child with a relatively large age gap from my parents, there was a high probability that I would be on my own in this world at a young age.
I would get these moments where I just panic while I am alone at home and my parents are out and the thought would cross my mind like 'why are they not back yet?', 'what if there was a car accident?' and hurry call them to check.
It is an extremely unnerving feeling that I really hate.

I can only pray for my parents' health and fortune, may they be safe and sound for many years to come, till they see me married and maybe even see their grandchildren.
And when they do pass on, I pray that it would be a natural and painless one.

There is no certainty in our life other than the fact that we were born and we will die.
What is stopping you from doing what you want in between?

Just saw this on Facebook.
Very empowering indeed.

After watching this,



Jay Chou, you are still awesome to me!!!

As much as it is overplayed, Jie Kou is still one of my all time favorite songs from Jay Chou.
And as I sit on the bus and look around at the people and the couples, I see that some are not even talking to each other, looking away from each other and into space or busy on their respective phones.
I realized that I don't want a relationship that turns stale.
I don't want a love that will become a mere habit or even worse a chore.

But at least I know that I am not someone who will stay in a relationship for the sake of it and settle for something else so I feel a sense of assurance. :)

Seriously in love with this song.
Sad songs always leave the deepest and most lasting impression.

Netherlands!
Mixed feelings, maybe cause I think I would have really wanted to go Germany but the terms in Germany is just way too weird.
Go with an open heart and you will definitely enjoy it :D

Jane Eyre finally went on Funshion!
What a beautifully filmed movie <3
And at the rate that I check Funshion for updates of my new shows, I hereby declare myself as a Funshion Addict.
OH SHIT.

I am in love with Solanin's soundtrack.
I foresee this being a soundtrack that I would be putting on repeat for quite a while just like Jay Chou's Secret's soundtrack.

Simple yet beautiful guitar tunes accompanied with piano melodies, adorable xylophone bits, soothing vocals (in surprisingly, English) and an appropriate touch of rock.
Wonderfully filmed movie, wonderfully composed soundtrack and a wonderfully crafted message to convey to the audience.
Perfect for a lovely Sunday afternoon.

What a dream come true to catch The Cranberries live in concert :)

And also for them to play so many songs from Bury the hatchet and Wake up and smell the coffee.
The lyrics just came flowing out of my mouth <3 (I probably screamed them but they seemed like whispers against the booming music)

Dolores is such a goddess and the band is so damn awesome live just as I expected :)
All these years have not eroded their musical talent and I'm sure they will be producing more great music for many years to come (new album out January say YAY)
They will always have a special place in my heart and be one of my all time favorite bands <3